I was having a weird day today. Ended up accidentally crashing a funeral! Hoooow? How did this happen? Well…
Last week I was reading in one of my cemetery books that there was a beautiful cemetery in Jaffrey NH. Really?? I mean I live very nearby and had never heard of this cemetery. The book also denoted the driveway to it was easy to miss and basically said it was in the middle of nowhere. It was called the Philips-Heil Cemetery which is not an unusual name as many of these older cemeteries are named after the original families that buried their loved ones in them. Seeing as it was in the middle of nowhere, likely a family cemetery, and very old (I’m talking slate stones here) I did not expect to find anyone out there.
It was indeed a bit of trouble to find but the sign out front was big enough to see coming from one direction. It was up a long narrow dirt driveway in the woods, so you could not see the cemetery from the road. As I drove up I found a parking lot. And it was FULL. I mean really full… there had to be thirty cars here. Whaaaat was going on?
I found a tiny slot where I could squeeze my Prius. A dirt road continued onward but I wasn’t about to get my wimpy ass Prius stuck and unable to turn around with so many witnesses. Later I’d learn it was only a short drive to overflow parking where there were spaces. Wish I’d known that.
Do I get out or turn around? People were already looking at my car. Hrumph. I got out. If I had to I could bluff in this odd Harold and Maude kinda moment. Upon getting out I realized this cemetery was TINY and there was no real way I could just wander by the services and pretend to be there for someone else, but I had no other option. I walked up to road by them getting dagger eyes from whoever was leading the ceremony. It was just wrapping up. I was not dressed for this sort of thing and was clearly an outsider.
By now I was uncomfortable and so were a great deal of others. I tried not to make eye contact as I walked to the opposite side of the cemetery and peered at the stones intently. Sadly, all these stones were super old and I couldn’t pretend I was here to leave flowers for a great uncle or something. By now I could smell the faint aroma of decay. That was odd. I’ve been to funerals before, I never remember smelling the dead. Then it dawned on me, I thought Heil might be a Jewish surname. Great. Did I just crash a Jewish funeral in the midst of that clusterfuck between Israel and Palestine? When tensions are at an all-time high?! YEAH, that might explain why the person leading this (the rabbi? The funeral director? Not sure) was watching me with such intensity it was burning a hole in my neck. I swear I was not here for any nefarious reasons. I couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s religion or ethnicity is – I just like the pretty stones!
As people were leaving a friendly man and his wife approached me smiling. Oh fuck, here it comes.
“Just out taking pictures today?”
“Yes, I like to take photos of historic grave markers.”
“Oh! Well! The newer stones are up front. You can see many generations of the Philips family here.”
“Thank you!” I smiled and wandered off.
Later I heard a girl and her mum speaking.
“Why is she here?” She asked, obviously referring to me.
“She might know someone buried here. Or she’s out taking photos of the old stones. People do that!”
“WHHHHHHY?!”
“Because they’re gorgeous!”
Touché, ma’am. Touché.
This cemetery was very small. Around 150 or so stones. Most were very old and in this setting, they were quite charming nestled away in a quiet corner of the woods. It was VERY New Englandy! Most were pretty uniform although there was one monument that stuck out at the back near the overflow parking. It wasn’t a headstone. It was a chair. Made of marble.
Later on in the day I looked up this cemetery’s history and found this note about the chair, “A striking memorial is that in the north end of the yard, looking across to Gap Mountain. It is a great stone chair, fit to be the throne of a monarch of the hills. It is a memorial of the Ross family, three generations of whom lived hereabout. It is said that according to the belief of a descendant, spirits often return to the scenes of their earthly existence, and so, with filial respect, he placed for them this chair, facing the sunset, where in seemly fashion they may sit at ease when they return to muse upon the scene of their earthly existence.” (You can find the rest of the article here.)
Basically, this cemetery was the remnants of a farming enclave that lived in between Jaffrey and Fitzwilliam, too far away from either to be fully incorporated. Very interesting! And without further ado here is the very scant few snaps I took.
